Thirty Days Thankful

Sometimes the holidays can feel like an onslaught of activities, obligations, and stress.  There’s too much to do and too little time in which to do it.  I’ve found that my family’s overall enjoyment of the last two months of the year increases exponentially when we intentionally focus on gratitude each day.  Here are thirty ways to practice being thankful for your family to try.  We’ve done some of them, and we plan to try the rest this year!

30 Days of Thanksgiving

1. Sort out your Halloween candy and talk about what kinds you each like best. Focusing on your favorites instead of complaining about too many lollipops fosters an attitude of gratitude.
2. Write thank-you notes for gifts received for birthdays and holidays. Depending on your child’s age, he or she can draw a picture, sign the note, or write the thank-yous.  Looking back through presents one by one after the event can help you and your children appreciate the thought that went into each gift received and the love that it represents.
3. Verbalize your appreciation. Your child watches everything you do, including when you go out of your way to be kind or help someone.
4. Donate your unused toys and household items to a community organization that helps people in our community. Get your kids in on the sorting action.  I’m often flabbergasted at my daughter’s willingness to give up even her favorite toys when we’re collecting items to give to other children.  You will feel good about helping those in need while freeing up space in your home.
5. Volunteer as a family. There are several community organizations in Portland with volunteer opportunities for children and their families, including Hands-On Portland, a United Way program that lists volunteering opportunities for families with kids 0-10 years old.  You and your kids can also volunteer to help with school activities or in your child’s classroom. 
6. Keep a gratitude jar. When someone in the family does something you appreciate, write it on a slip of paper and place it in the jar.  Younger children can draw a picture or ask for help with writing.
7. Donate to a local food pantry. Find out the needs of your local food bank and make a special trip to the grocery store, or dig through your pantry to find unopened food that you can spare.  Many food banks also accept financial donations, and they can make the most of your money with bulk buying and special arrangements with retailers.
8. Practice random acts of kindness. Pay for the person behind you at the coffee shop, leave an extra-large tip in a tip jar, or send a kind text or email to your partner or a friend.  You never know when someone might need a bit of extra sunshine in their day.
9. Pay it forward. Think of something kind someone has done for you and do the same for someone else.
10. Play a game together. There’s nothing like connecting at the kitchen table over a rousing game of Uno or Candy Land to help your family connect and enjoy each other’s company.  We’re teaching my six-year-old, Karys, to play Uno, and she’s becoming quite the little card shark.
11. Thank a veteran. Veteran’s Day on November 11 is a great day to say thank you to a veteran in your life.  There are also programs that will collect handwritten notes and cards and send them to soldiers past and present.
12. Thank a teacher. If your child has something nice to say about his or her teacher, relay the compliment by email or send a handwritten note from you or your child.  As a former teacher, I can tell you that a single compliment can go a long way.
13. Thank your mail carrier. The holidays are a busy time for the people who help get packages from point A to point B.  Write a note to thank them for all they do.
14. Thank your parents.  Think back on how your parents taught you what family means.  If you can, let them know how you carry on the traditions they handed down.
15. Keep a gratitude journal or a list as a family or on your own. Sometimes reflecting on what we have helps us appreciate what we have, and it’s a great practice to pass down to kids.
16. Get outside. Go for a walk and take in the fall colors, the misty rain, and the crisp autumn air.
17. Put your phone down. There’s nothing to steal your joy like comparing your real life to someone else’s idealized one.  Even if it’s just for half an hour, take some tech-free time to reset and pay attention to all you have going for you.
18. Share a meal. Invite friends over for a simple dinner or order pizza together, or invite some friends over for Thanksgiving if you know you’ll have an extra place or two at the table.
19. Call a friend or family member just to chat. If I’m feeling overwhelmed, having a laid-back conversation with my mom or one of my close friends can lift my mood in a hurry.
20. Follow your child’s lead. Children can be the greatest teachers of gratitude.  The other day, just after the rain lifted, Karys said to me, “Isn’t it a beautiful day?”  I honestly hadn’t noticed what the day had to offer, because I was caught up in my to-do list, but, you know, she was right.
21. Give an honest compliment. If you notice someone’s beautiful scarf or hard work on a project, tell them.  You never know how your words might turn someone’s day around.
22. Donate to an organization that helps refugees. If you have food, shelter, and safety, you have something to give to refugees, many of whom are starting their lives over from scratch. 
23. Do what you can, then rest. Don’t beat yourself up if you don’t get to everything on your shopping list or your to-do list.  In fact, see if you can knock some things off your list outright if they aren’t absolutely necessary.
24. Have your kids help you make personalized name tags for the Thanksgiving table. My aunt Evalin started this tradition when her children were very small, and it continues today now that her children are all grown.  Helping with the preparations for holiday meals can help your child feel invested in the festivities and proud of his or her contribution.
25. Make a table centerpiece from items you and your kids collect from around the house and outside. Back when my family celebrated Thanksgiving with my aunt Karen in North Carolina, I started the tradition of creating a centerpiece from things I could find while walking in the woods near her house.  Today, Karys and I continue the tradition by collecting leaves, sticks, flowers, candles, and other items to create a beautiful and unique centerpiece each year.
26. Plan your Thanksgiving meal around your priorities. Decide what dishes and traditions suit your family best and plan your meal around that.  Who says you can’t have pizza for Thanksgiving dinner?
27. Back away from Black Friday. Sure the sales are great, but do you really want to stand in line for three hours to get a TV for a dollar?  If so, go for it, but if not, stay home guilt-free.
28. Get a head start on decorations. Scour your yard or neighborhood for pine cones or sticks to create unique winter ornaments and decorations for your home.  Spending time together getting creative is a great way to build memories without spending a dime.
29. Take time to play together. Toss around a football, hula hoop in the front yard, or skip around the block. You’re sure to have a few good laughs and make some memories at the same time.
30. Reflect on what November gave you. I try to make time at the end of each month, season, and year to appreciate what that time gave me or taught me.  Try it.  You just might realize how much you and your family have grown and changed in a seemingly short amount of time.